As long as there have been casinos, people have been getting into trouble in them. In fact, disputes commonly erupted in the alleyways of London when sports betting was hidden from sight, and even in America’s Old West saloons between card players. Sometimes, having a crafty tongue can get someone out of a tight jam. Other times, opening ones’ mouth only makes things worse. Here are a few stories of excuses that casinos have heard recently that didn’t help the person’s case one bit. 1. “I was drunk.” Mark Johnson, a resident of California, headed to Vegas for some high-stakes games in January 2014. He had a few drinks and went to the casino. However, PaiGao and blackjack were his nemeses that day, and he blew through all the cash he’d brought in no time. The Downtown Grand was all too happy to extend him a 100,000 dollar line of credit, though, and he kept gambling. After he blew through the first cash advance, as well as some more booze, the casino gave him another 100,000 dollars to play with. It almost seemed as if the Downtown Grand got smart for just a moment, because when that money ran out, they only gave him 50,000 dollars. The drinks kept rolling, and he continued losing. It wasn’t long before the third advance was gone as well. Then, the casino did something peculiar. They handed over a whopping 250,000 dollars. By the time his binge was over, Mr. Johnson was slurring his words, dropping chips and couldn’t even stand up at the table. He’d lost 17 hours and 500,000 dollars, in total, to the Downtown Grand. Now, he says he shouldn’t have to pay his debts, because responsible gambling regulations state the casino staff should not have allowed him to play due to his clear inebriation. He claims he was victimized and is suing the company for the full amount of his debts. No word on how this will pan out legally for him just yet, but he won’t be permitted back in the casino anytime soon. 2. “I’m superstitious.” Anyone who follows professional poker probably knows who Phil Ivey is. Though there are no hard figures, some sources estimate he has a net-worth of over a billion dollars earned from playing poker. Because he’s so well-known, the Borgada staff was more than happy to cater to his wishes back in 2012 when he arrived to play baccarat. Among those requests was a private table, permission to have a guest with him while he played, a dealer who spoke Mandarin, and he wanted to use Gemaco playing cards. Ivey claimed that each request was made because he was superstitious, and he needed these things to bring him luck. Whatever was on his side, he brought in 9.6 million dollars over a two-day span. However, the casino contends that he was using these things to gain an edge on the house, and that each of the things he needed for good luck, were actually helping him edge-sort. When a deck of cards is made with patterned backs, some gamblers use the imperfections, or the way the design meets the edge of each card, to predict what each card is. It’s an effective trick, but it’s also illegal. Despite his claims that he wasn’t edge-sorting, and that he is superstitious, the casino is suing him. It’s also worth noting that Crockfords, a London casino, recently won a similar case against Ivey. However, the professional poker player intends to appeal the court’s decision. It’s not likely any casino will cater to his “superstitious” ways again, though. 3. “Counting cards is legal.” Justin Mills was a somewhat well-known high-roller at the Maryland Live! casino in Hanover, Maryland. In fact, they actually sent a luxury car to pick him up for a visit back in February 2014. His game of choice was blackjack, and he was playing at a 100 dollar-minimum table when security showed up. Mills said he was actually down 2,800 dollars when a casino officer twisted his arm behind his back and escorted him away from the table. He claims the use of force was excessive and, to add insult to injury, he had to pay 75 dollars for a taxi ride home. The state says there isn’t enough evidence to file criminal charges against Maryland Live! yet Mills is still distraught. The casino has banned him for life, although he’s legally permitted to count cards. Perhaps the fact that counting cards really is legal, and that casinos do have an obligation not to allow people to bet while under the influence of alcohol, will keep two of these men out of trouble in court. However, none of these excuses helps one bit if they hope to gamble in the same venues again. Moreover, word travels fast among land-based casinos and even if they are permitted into other venues, it’s quite likely someone will be keeping close watch.